Bachelor oFarts

Bachelor oFarts

Bachelor oFarts

THE POETRY OF FART LOGIC books (Barnyard Gas, “CS” [TOXIC] GAS, Elevator Gas, High Octane Gas, Laughing Gas, Legal Gas, Natural Gas, Nerve Gas, Conflatulations to You, Bachelor oFarts, Breaking Wind, Brain Farts, and The Best Of Fart Logic Volumes I, II, and III) are the result of many years of practicing “ Psycho Fartology.” Dr. Wolfgang (German for the Latin Canis Lupis) has skillfully harnessed this science to produce these quirky, outrageously ridiculous passports for good mental health. They are guaranteed to be a cure for boredom, for killing time, and for expressing a thought not otherwise kosher or ethical.

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The Eye Doctor’s Test

A Sample Poem from THE POETRY OF FART LOGIC Book, “BACHELOR OFARTS” by Dr. Wolfgang…

He was at his eye doctor because he couldn’t see
He was scared to death ‘till struck by an epiphany
For an eye test he had to pass, it had to be
Failing would disturb his equanimity

He was peeking at a chart to memorize it
The last thing he wanted to do was fail
Five rungs of letters he learned while he wait and sit
He hoped it was enough through his eye test to sail

When it came his turn to read what he see
He had no trouble, for his memory was good
He was proud cuz he recalled the chart perfectly
Getting high marks is what he understood

He walked out of his eye doc’s joint happily
He’d passed a very difficult test he thought
But he was still blind as a bat, unfortunately
Perfect vision his test score should have brought

Why he couldn’t see better was a mystery
For the man was sure he had an A+ read
It should have led to seeing perfectly
He couldn’t understand why he didn’t succeed.